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How do you monitor grief and why do it?

Monitoring is a simple activity that can help you learn about grief – the emotions and thoughts that accompany it and what you do when grief gets strong. The Grief Tracker is a simple tool that can help you monitor your grief over time.

If you’re using a computer, you can access the Grief Tracker from the left sidebar under Widgets. If you’re using a mobile device, click on the menu icon in the upper left corner of your screen and select Grief Tracker under Widgets.

Here’s how you do it:

1) Take about 5 minutes each evening to think back over your day. 

2) Think of a time during that day when your grief level was at its highest.

  • Move the highest level slider on the grief tracker to the level of your highest grief (1 is the lowest and 10 is the highest grief intensity you have ever experienced).

  • Type a brief text note about what was happening at that time.

3) Now think of a time during the day when your grief level was lowest, move the lowest grief slide to the right level and type a brief note about what was happening at that time.

4) Lastly, consider the day, overall. Was it a high, moderate or low grief day? Then move the overall day slider to the right level: 8-10 if it was a high day, 4-7 if a moderate day and 1-3 for a low grief day. Type a note about the overall day if you wish.

Here’s an example:

Let’s say that yesterday your highest grief was a 9 in the early afternoon (about 1:30 pm) when a friend called to tell you that her father died. You move the slider to 9 and type “Jess called to say her father died”. You think about your lowest level and decide it was a 6 during your morning walk when you stopped to watch some children playing in the park. You move the bottom slider to 6 and write in the text box, “watching children on morning walk.” You move the third slider to a 7 and make note “Still missing D and feeling sad a lot.”

Remember, grief is very stressful, however it’s also is a form of love and it’s permanent after you lose someone you love. Your grief tracker will help you learn how to let grief have a place in your life. It is possible to move forward with a sense of purpose, meaning and possibilities for happiness even though grief is a part of your life.


You might want to periodically review your grief monitoring entries and reflect on them. Can you learn anything about your grief as you do this? For example, what do you notice about the high levels and what do you notice about the low levels and the overall levels? Do you see any patterns? Do you have any questions? You can direct message our team with questions.


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